A few years ago I resolved to stop making New Years resolutions, and its been about the only New Years Resolution I ever stuck with..

What I realized when I made that resolution was that if I choose to attempt something out of an obligation, rather than a true commitment that I would always fail. Setting a goal on January 1st to change all your bad habits is a bad habit in itself. Something like 10% of people actually stick with their New years resolutions, an embarrassingly low figure but entirely understandable. The problem is setting goals for ourselves that doom us to failure- resolving to never eat chocolate again.. really, who are you kidding?

Rather than make a half-hearted New Years resolution to change, make a resolution to focus on living better in the day to day. Focus this year on small every day changes that build you as a person. Focus on attainable goals that will bring you joy, rather than extravagant resolutions that bring only failure. Focus on finding yourself- find what you love and run to it, surround yourself with positive people who treat you with respect, and treat other with the kindness you expect in return. In your every day dealings strive to act with integrity, empathy and understanding. Remember that every pair of eyes sees the world differently, and that some have seen terrible things. If the eyes are indeed the window to the soul then look for the good. Focus on the little things and suddenly then the big picture is no longer so daunting. Banish negative thinking with positive attitude, don’t complain, make the change- you are responsible for your happiness.

Life often seems to linear, but with each New Year it becomes clear that a life isn’t a line of choices made one after another leading to either success or failure, but a cycle of repeating patterns based on our actions as creatures of habit. Our success or failures are only defined by others if we allow them to be. You are an individual, and who but you could know what is best for yourself? Each of us is an amalgamation of our own personal history- we are who we are because of who we made ourselves, so rather than try to find someone to fix you, find the strength in yourself to be who you want to be. It okay if you make mistakes along the way, its okay to fail, as long as you do not define yourself by your failures. Its okay to be wrong, but have the strength to admit when it is so and the ability to apologize and move forward.

xo, aiyana

Some believe it is only great power that can hold evil in check, but that is not what I have found. I found it is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay… small acts of kindness and love.

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